The others are out partying
Cruising in their urban assault vehicles
One night they shot chicks in the ass with a plastic dart gun
Outside the neighborhood convenience store
And a girl panicked and the police showed up
They told them to put their toys away and go to bed
After the bars closed but the night wasn’t done for them
But I stayed home in my apartment reading
That night I heard about, it was Blake
I was deep in the wailing and groaning mythic Giants
And Sunday afternoon I was explaining
An ethics paper I was working on to a girl I picked up Friday night
About love and state public policy, bussing and race
And she asked me how long it took me to write the poem I gave her
It didn’t last because, she said, I wasn’t in business and it was the ‘80’s
We’ve already made terms with living impoverished
And not being able to afford a lot of beers
But there are still ways to get into trouble
SEMI-FULFILLED POTENTIALS
19 Jun 2019 Leave a comment
in Blog Tags: avolition, bad jobs, bipolar disorder, grad student, poem, poetry, poverty, self, student
Pretty much my whole adult life
I’ve been more or less semi-retired
A full-time undergraduate and grad
Student and the poverty and the freedom
Writing and performing music
Writing and researching papers and theses
Bipolar disorder’s attenuated capacities
Avolition and crippled will to persevere
Those week-ends asleep in bed—
The weekend through: Friday till Monday morning
Those lost weekends
A post-doctoral funk and bad jobs
Part-time teaching and poverty
Writing and publishing a book and journal articles
Music and poetry and bad jobs
A good job preaching, a calling, and full-time pay
Recording a CD of my originals and poetry and newspaper bylines
Volunteer positions and committees and seminar presentations
All for joy and no pay
Pretty much semi-retired and all of it