Challenge
It is a challenge for me,
As and because I so often challenge myself,
To lie and not move on an acupuncture table
With fine needles in meridians for 40 minutes
Challenging, to do nothing, motionless, for 40 minutes
And what do I have to do? Shift? Watch TV, motionless on the couch?
I heal and restore ch’i flow, prone for 40 minutes
My mind blanks and goes I don’t know where, stress relieves
The Hindu Balason Nithya healer scanned me with her third eye and said
I put pressure on myself (she almost said, “stress,” and corrected it)
Her insight astounded me; her call, so right
(Though her guru, Paramahamsa Nithyananda, fled India on rape charges)
I can’t seem to rest and go about the task at hand
Always there are new challenges, a new way to
Make myself anxious, upset, disappointed, with accomplishment’s attempts
And also elated, thrilled, satisfied, with accomplishment
But I’ve been all that before, even in my early 20’s
When I once wrote that I’ve had it all enough for proud contentment
Then, the Balasonic observation manifests again in me—probably
Why it’s hard to lie motionless on the acupuncture table for 40 minutes
Salve
It is, perhaps, something different
To configure my consciousness for happiness
And even as I ponder this, happiness cracks through dour
Cracks through pressure upon the self
Since that happiness nature gifted me
Abruptly caved with bipolar depression
And dancing through the day stumbled
Crashing pleasant drives to do, drive crashed
Craving accomplishment as its own only reward
(I had nothing else)—the ordinary happiness
Gifted us all by nature that made bartenders glad to see me
Such a dance, too, made it difficult to be still
Passive knowing supplanting activity begetting
Now that conscious configuration of consciousness requisite
To render happiness. And why not crack through dour?
(Without getting into too much trouble)
As a madcap without Hal’s royal safeguard
Can engender, has engendered, by this cutup
When I fancied myself my own legislator
Endearing trouble to this now reflexology of mirth
Reflecting that mirth be a matter of adjustment
Of only consciousness, and it may be that Creative Energy
Is configured toward our several happiness, all
If we but configure toward Its end